Real Groom Ed Robins
PHOTOGRAPHY EMMA CASE
Groom Ed Robins, 26
Bride Aneesha Sondhi
Best Man As I wanted to follow Indian traditions, my best man was my younger brother Joseph Robins.
Ushers We did not have ushers/groomsmen. We did have Ammo Ginday, who was our compère. Ammo is the son of the secretary at the Guru Ravidas Temple in Walsall where we were married. As this was a mixture of cultures we really needed somebody to help all the non-Indian guests. This came from Ammo, who was amazing on the day, and Aneesha’s cousins, who were also fantastic. They really helped everyone feel welcome and at ease.
How did you propose? After we had been together for a couple of years and we knew we would get married, it was just a question of timing. We had a lot going on and money was tight. As she knew I was going to propose, I decided that doing it in an elaborate way would be too obvious, and if it was in front of loads of people she would probably hurt me. There was no way I could choose a ring that she would like either, so that had to come after. The only thing I could do was to do it when she least expected, so I ordered some glow in the dark letters online and wrote ‘Will you marry me’ on a piece of paper which, after a day under a lamp, I then pinned to the wall in the bedroom. This was in a position that you wouldnt notice until you were in bed and the light was off. I also bought a kids chunky flashing strobe jelly ring for about £2 and hid it under the bed.
One night we came home from a normal evening, I think we went to Nandos which as a favourite for us. Nothing special, we went to bed as normal. Once the light was off and we were going to sleep she saw the message and said “What’s that on the wall ?” so I said “I don’t know, what is it ?” thinking, it’s obvious, she can read it but doesn’t know how to react. I looked round at the message and realised I couldn’t read it – I failed to take into account the fact that we both wear contact lenses, which obviously come out at night, so my glowing proposal on the wall looked more like something Slimer from Ghostbusters left behind. As she leaned accross the bed to get a closer look, I took the flashing ring from under the bed, turned it on and got down on one knee. The room started flashing and she started panicking, thinking the police were here or something. I put the ring on and asked her again “will you marry me?” – she said yes and and we both just broke out laughing for ages.
What can you tell us about your stag do? Stag do was in Nottingham. We met up in a pub in Mansfield, had beers and breakfast at about 10 am and then went Rage Buggy racing, which is awesome. Then out into Nottingham for a bar crawl and finished off in a club. Fortunately I managed to come away unscathed, as they were counting on me not holding my drink. Unusally for me I was downing anything that came my way yet managed to stay on two feet the whole night; Ed-1 Lads-Nil.
Where did you get married? Both wedding and reception venues were chosen by my wife. They were intimate locations and not too far from home. We wanted to have an Indian ceremony and a reception in the evening. Berrow Court is a refurbished manor in Edgbaston which I would highly recomend. The owners and the staff are extremly professional and ensure everything goes perfectly.
What did the men wear on the day? I had two outfits: one for the indian ceremony in the morning and another for the reception. Both were bought, not hired. I wore a white, silver and blue sherwani with a burgundy turban and scarf. The turban was wrapped professionally in the morning by Vicky Pagg. My Sherwani was from Ziggies. Both Ziggi and Vicky went above and beyond with their services to us and I would highly recommend them to anybody. My English cultural background was never an issue with either of them, just in case you were wondering.
What advice would you give to future grooms? Future grooms should be aware that you will be asked for input into things you have no opinion about. The best advice I can give is, if you’re asked “what do you think about this?”, say anything, even if you dont care. If you say “the blue ones are nice”, she will say “I prefer the red” and boom! - she has made the decision and you are contributing. Its a win-win (except my wife will read this and then punch me in the face).
Also, have your stag do at least four weeks before the event. This is mainly to ease her mind, as she will be damned if you ruin her big day by breaking your leg in a drunken stupor. This will allow time for you to heal minor injuries incurred.
Finally: the whole organising will be a strain. You will argue about each other’s families. This is normal. None of this will matter on the day. You will want to save money and she will want to spend it. Remember, you can still have the wedding you want without the huge price tag, you just need to clever about where you spend the money.
A word for the lady… My wife has been my backbone since the day we got together. Since meeting her I have accomplished things I never thought possible. its true that behind every sucessful man is strong woman. Im just happy I have found mine. We’ve only been married a few months but together we will conquer the world! I would also like to add that we are now expecting our first child. Get in!
Staggered says massive, huge congratulations to future parents Ed and Aneesha – Ed, you should sign up to Staggered’s new parenting social site We Are The Dads and keep us up to date. We’ll be interested to find out whether your strategy of feigning interest in uninteresting decisions can be successful when there’s a pregnant woman involved.