How To Pull At A Wedding
Pulling at a wedding should be a cinch, right? There’s loads of single women there, they’re all feeling romantic, a little tipsy and best of all they’re tinged with desperation that their mate is getting spliced before them. But as the saying goes: don’t make assumptions because it’ll make an ass out of u and mptions. You’ll still need to do some work and that’s where our top tips on pulling on the big day come in (p.s. if you’re a groom reading this then shame on you).
1. Get involved as much as possible before hand
Depending on how close you are to the bride or groom, offer to help set up or get involved on the day somehow. The more you’re an integral part of the wedding, the more you’ll get a chance to meet and be seen talking to a lot of people, which elevates your social status at the wedding and makes you someone women would want to talk to.
2. Don’t leer at the bridesmaids
Most single guys at weddings are on the prowl and checking out the bridesmaids as soon as they walk in. Don’t be most guys – that’s a surefire way to ruin your pulling chances.
3. Don’t get drunk
Most men feel the need to have a few drinks at the wedding reception before they start talking to women – especially ones they find really attractive. One or two drinks aren’t too bad, but once that snowballs into being drunk by the end of the night, it’s a real turn-off for women.
4. Introduce yourself to everyone early on
At weddings, you have an automatic excuse to talk to people. It’s not like being at a random bar or nightclub where it requires some kind of creative or ballsy opening line to go talk to a stranger.
All you need to say is, “Hi, I’m Jeremy,” shake their hand and ask them how they know the bride or groom. You want to do this early on in the day so that at the reception in the evening, you have a ton of people you’ve already talked with and can re-initiate contact with.
5. Introduce groups of friends and family to each other
As things progress, introduce groups of people you know to each other. Being seen as a social connector and someone who knows everyone at the wedding will build huge amounts of attraction with the women there.
Introducing your friends to the friends of a woman you like can also be useful because it can allow you to have a more private conversation with her while your friends engage her friends.
6. Re-initiate contact with the women you like
Keep being the social guy, talking to lots of different people, but at some point re-engage the woman you find the most attractive. At this point, you’ve already talked with her, it’s natural to re-initiate conversation by asking her something simple like, “how are you enjoying the wedding?”
7. Connect with her emotionally
Get more personal with her, find out who she is and what makes her tick, and let her know more about yourself. The key to attraction with women is showing yourself to be an interesting person (by talking about things that are important to you and you are passionate about) and to be interested in who she is as a person.
8. Take her somewhere more private
A woman might become attracted to you when she has a good conversation with you, but she’s unlikely to act on that by kissing you or otherwise blatantly flirting with you in front of her friends and family.
So come up with an excuse to move her somewhere away from other people. It can as simple as, “Do you fancy going out for some air?” or “Hey, want to grab a drink at the bar?” Anything that gets you some more alone time with her.
9. Suggest staying in touch
You may want to spend more time with the woman you’ve been talking to immediately, maybe even try to take her home that night.
However, this won’t always be possible depending on who she came with, whether she has to get up early the next morning, which friends she is there with etc. There’s also the chance that for whatever reason, you’ll lose her at some point in the crowd.
So it’s a good idea after talking with her for a while to suggest exchanging contact details and staying in touch. That way, if she does disappear at some point, at least you have a phone number to follow up on.
10. Manage logistics
If you are going for the full pull that evening, you need to focus on getting her away from people that might judge her for going home with you. Discretion is paramount. Don’t make any obvious moves on her physically when anyone else is around.
Either find a secluded room somewhere, or ask her if she wants to come back to your place. If you go for the latter, make sure you both have a discreet way of getting away from the party without people knowing that you’re going home together, e.g. offering to give her a lift home.
What do you think – any other tips for pulling on the big day? Have your say on the comments or over at the forums.
Our thanks to Jeremy Soul, a dating coach for www.lovesystems.com who will be in London on December 26th for his Day Game Workshop, check it out if you want to polish your approach before the big day. Again, if you’re going to be the groom and you’re thinking of going – shame on you.
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