2012 Staggered Groom Survey: The Results
Released to celebrate the launch of The Staggered Groom Guide (£4.99, click to order), the Staggered Groom Survey is the most complete annual survey of how the men of the wedding are coping with the stresses and strains of the big day.
Although the wedding is traditionally seen as the bride’s big day, these days the grooms are every bit as involved, with 61.3% of grooms taking up at least half the slack or mucking on more than the bride.
Choosing their own clothes, menu and the venue for the wedding are the groom’s prime concerns, with gift lists, flowers and wedding planners exciting the least interest.
The growing trend for increased groom involvement seems in the main to be a welcome development, with 73% of grooms reporting no resistance to their involvement. However, for the 27% of grooms who do find themselves pushed out it’s not the mother-in-law who is denying access – it’s that other old monster: Mecha-Bridezilla.
“It’s initially surprising that the bride is blocking grooms from getting involved as you would imagine any help would be welcomed, as the wedding is a major investment of time and effort. However, the Bridezilla-type definitely does exist and it’s potentially these women who are putting their foot down and declaring that the groom can choose between her way and the high way. We wish these men luck,” says Andrew Shanahan, editor of The Staggered Groom Guide.
One of the main reasons for the emergence of groom interest in wedding planning is the continuing trend for couples to take on financial responsibility for the wedding themselves. The Groom Survey showed that typically couples were spending between £10,000 and £15,000 on their big day, but over 10% were splashing out more than £25,000. With 66.7% of this sum being met either exclusively or mostly by the couples this clearly can put great financial strain on the relationship from the very beginning.
The stag do is obviously a major source of interest for the groom, so it’s surprising that nearly one in ten men are choosing not to take a stag. Of those who are participating, it’s clear that the notion of the stag do being a last chance to be with another woman is the last thing on their mind – nearly 95% of stags say that the last night of freedom is no excuse for infidelity.
“The old-fashioned idea of the stag do being about reckless infidelity and wanton drunkenness is dead,” explains Shanahan. “The modern groom is very keen to have the rite of passage of a stag do but the fact that nearly one in ten choose not to have one suggests that it’s by no means essential. Naturally, drinking is a big part of the stag do but these days they are more about disparate groups from the groom’s life meeting for the first time and getting to know each other.”
If that’s a relief for the bride to hear then the statistics for the groom’s least worrying aspect of the wedding experience should be music to her ears – 89.2% say that they have no or very few nerves about the first night. This is in stark contrast to the speech, finances and proposals which top the list of things the grooms lose sleep over.
STAGGERED GROOM SURVEY RESULTS
As a groom how involved are you in the planning?
- More involved than my other half – 9.3%
- Involved in some things – 38.7%
- Just as much as my other half – 52%
Top Three Elements Grooms Are Involved In
- Choosing the clothes – 93.3%
- Selecting the food and drink – 93.3%
- Choosing the wedding venue – 89.3%
Three elements the grooms are least involved in:
- Choosing a wedding planner – 6.7%
- Picking the flowers – 22.7%
- Picking the gift list – 53.3%
Have you encountered resistance to your involvement?
- 73% No
- 27% Yes
If you’ve encountered resistance to the idea of you being involved who was it from?
- Mates 30%
- Mother in law – 25%
- Wife-to-Be – 40%
- Wedding suppliers – 15%
- Media – 30%
How much are you spending on the wedding?
- Up to £5k – 5.3%
- 5-10k – 16%
- 10-15k – 36%
- 15-20k – 26.7%
- 20-25k – 5.3%
- 25k plus – 10.7%
Who is paying for the wedding?
- You and partner – 25%
- Groom’s parents – 1.4%
- Bride’s parents – 8.3%
- Combination (you providing biggest share) – 41.7%
- Combination (bride’s parents biggest share) – 23.6%
Hiring or buying your wedding suit?
- Hire – 65.3%
- Buy – 34.7%
Are you planning on having a stag do?
- Yes – 90.7%
- No – 9.3%
Does it matter if you’re unfaithful on your stag do
- Yes – 94.6%
- No – 5.4%
Three most nervous elements
- Wedding speech – 39.2% either very or extremely nervous
- Paying for the wedding – 36.5% either very or extremely nervous
- Proposing – 28% either very or extremely nervous
Least three nervous elements
- Choosing your suit – 98.7% saying they were not nervous at all or only a bit nervous
- First night – 89.2% saying they were not nervous at all or only a bit nervous
- Booking the honeymoon – 90.5% saying they were not nervous at all or only a bit nervous
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Great survey and very itneresting..! Especially the results of what happens on the stag do…what happens on tour…stays on tour I suppose!!
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