World’s Weirdest Wedding Laws
In the office we were discussing how lame all those “weirdest law” articles are and how people who write them for their sites are essentially idiots. To back up our case we had a look at a few weird wedding laws and found them so interesting that we decided to eat humble pie and post them. Sorry. We’re idiots. And lame. For extra fun we’ve made one up – see if you can spot which one it is.
- In North Carolina, it is illegal by state law to book into a hotel under the illusion that you are a husband and wife when in fact you’re actually filthy deviants. Although interestingly and ironically, a North Carolina court will immediately annul a marriage in which “the deal isn’t sealed”, otherwise known as a wet blanket of a wedding night.
- Back here in the UK, any wedding must take place under a fixed roof, ie. A Church. Of course, plenty of folk risk the rain in an outdoor ceremony, but then must attend a civil induction.
- In Florida, single, divorced and widowed women can’t parachute on a Sunday afternoon, leaving the skies free for falling for just the married sort. What an incentive
- Meanwhile, Floridian women should get all their plate breaking out of their system before they wed their husband, as after marriage, they are legally limited to break only three a day.
- If a marriage in Tennessee isn’t working out, the man in the equation can espace almost entirely scot-free… assuming he’s happy to leave his ex-beloved with, ’10 pounds of dried beans, 5 pounds of dried apples, a side of meat, and ample yarn to knit herself stockings for a year.’ Nice.
- In Woking you can create a wife out of sponge fingers and other baked goods but if you don’t consume your wife within three days then your cake wife is legally entitled to half your goods.
- In Kentucky, it is illegal for a woman to marry the same man more than three times, so you should definitely be sure by then, if you aren’t already.
- In the heat of Los Angeles, a man is legally obliged to beat his wife with a leather strap, as long as it is 2 inches wide or less. If he wishes to beat her with anything larger, he must first gain her written consent. This is very important.
- The Balanta tribe of Africa has the rather maniacal sounding law that states a woman must stay married until her wedding dress has worn out. Fortunately, a clause states that after a month of misery, she is free to rip it up and escape wedlock.
- In Montana, you can actually get two friends married on your behalf as part of a sort of ‘wedding by proxy’ scheme.
- In the Bihar state of India, prospective wealthy grooms can be kidnapped by a poorer bride’s family, and forced into wedlock at gunpoint. For reference, the practice is called Pakdauau Shaadi. Oh, and it’s legal.
The fake one is the Woking one. It’s actually Brent.