What If I’m Too Drunk To…
I am worried that I will be too drunk to perform on our wedding night. What can I do to ensure I’m still sober enough by bedtime?
Don’t drink too much!
There isn’t really as way round this one. Either you get drunk or you get laid. The sex you have when you are drunk, even a little drunk won’t be the same, or as good. Couples have sex for many reasons from simply experiencing the physical pleasure but also for creating intimacy and building a strong emotional bond.
It’s up to you and your new wife to decide how important the first married sex you have is. And if it’s really important to you then make a choice. You can either, have a great party, drink lots and decide to make your first marital sex really special by planning to do that on another night. Or you can stay sober and make love to your wife. Making love and making merry don’t really go together. Alcohol numbs the senses and makes you less present so the sex you have will be much less satisfying. The effects of alcohol on men are well known but it causes similar problems for women as it inhibits her ability to orgasm.
Sex is really important in a relationship; it’s both the glue that binds you together and the barometer that lets you know how well the relationship is doing. Bad sex can be both a cause and a symptom of problems in the marriage. To have the kind of intimate, loving sex that creates a strong bond you both need to be very present, and aware. Sex involves your senses being wide open so that you can experience all the sensations, physical, emotional and even spiritual.
The first time you make love as husband and wife can be quite important for some couples. When you do this not only is the sex better, more intense physically, but you will build a powerfully strong bond with your wife that will lead to a long and happy marriage. So you really do need to choose.
The good news is that delaying gratification and waiting for another night can increase the intensity, intimacy and pleasure when you do make love. So delaying this for another night can work in your favour. You can use the time to build the anticipation and excitement making that first time really special. Tantrikas regularly take several days to prepare for making love. So the choice needn’t be “which” but “when”, this is one of the times when you really can have your cake and eat it (so to speak).
To your bliss
Lisa
The O Coach
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