Wedding Dress Shopping From A Bride Who Knows
I told you that I would get Han to give her dress related wisdom sometime soon. I didn’t lie. And without further ado, I won’t steal her thunder, here is what Han is thinking today, mostly she as bin finking….about dresses….
The one on the right.
Being of slightly unusual proportions, I knew my search for the ideal wedding dress had to begin as soon as possible. At 5 foot 2, big boobs, short torso, wide hips but surprisingly lean looking legs, I had some serious thinking to do.
I began ripping out pictures of dresses whilst we were still in Cape Town to work out what I was after – I figured it must be sensible going into shops with some sort of idea. I was wrong.
Dress shopping day 1 was in Stamford. A classy town with beautiful architecture, well dressed people and quaint shops. So why was it that every bridal shop looked from the outside like a tacky fancy dress shop lined with horrendous shiny fabrics and balloons hanging in each corner? Why weren’t they charming little shops with antique books lining the windows? Apparently this isn’t what people look for in a dress shop.
After getting over this initial disappointment I stepped into my first few shops with the excitement and enthusiasm I’d always dreamt of. We (my mum and I) were met by various middle-aged women wanting to offer us tea and discuss the wedding plans we didn’t yet have and didn’t wish to think about whilst we had bigger fish to fry. Browsing the rails of dresses took little time. Everything looked the same. Big, ivory meringues with flowers and cheap-looking jewels. I looked at my mum with confusion as she flicked through with a similar look of dismay. Luckily the shop assistants were on hand to suggest a few designs.
Apparently it is necessary to try all styles, colours, shapes and fabrics before getting a set idea of what I wanted. So, despite saying I wanted something classy, fairly plain, not too long in the body, not a big meringue style skirt, modern and not too flowery, I was asked to try the absolute opposite. I was right though – A huge skirt did make me look like a badly dressed 90’s doll. A long and structured bodice did make me look like a dwarf.
With each dress I tried on, I walked out of the changing room swinging the skirts around like Fran Sinclair’s tail in Dinosaurs. I now know it is fine to feel this way, and fine to tell people after the occasion, but that the shop owners don’t enjoy hearing it, and certainly don’t appreciate it. It’s not my fault they designed their dresses based on 1990’s cartoon characters!
My second shopping experience in Boston was not so different. In fact, I’m sure the assistants must have all gone to the same Bridal Shop Assistant School of Shit Personalities. Dull, dull, dull and completely uninspiring. Each dress looked the same to me. I did eventually find a few dresses that didn’t make me look like a Jurassic dwarf, but each dress looked very similar. If there is one thing I don’t want for my wedding day, it is to look like every other bride and for people to forget my dress. That just won’t do. Nor will it do that I would require a ‘tummy sucking in thing’, as suggested by one of my bridesmaids. I can’t blame her for the comment – it is the fault of the dress and, if I’m being honest, my over-eating habits. Perhaps another contributory factor here is the fact the dresses only appear to exist in size 8 or size 16 in these shops. How can that be helpful??
On recommendation we contacted a local dressmaker and stockist of alternative designers (Caroline Chamberlain). Once again my mum and I made our way there, feeling a little uneasy about making an hours trip to another one of these awful shops. Walking up to the shop window we both began to grin, realising that the window wasn’t done up like a child’s fancy dress party. There were two beautiful vintage style dresses in the window unlike anything I’d seen so far. We walked in and introduced ourselves to a young lady who asked me what I liked, what looked good, if I had a scrap book of ideas she could look at (ha… only a good 25 pages). She was able to suggest a few ideas for me to try, I also picked a few off the rails.
The fab thing about this shop was that no two dresses resembled each other at all. I tried 6 dresses. They all looked great – well made, modern, individual and not a hint of a hefty dinosaur tail to clutch behind me. OK, so they didn’t all suit me, but they didn’t look ridiculous. We discussed what aspects of which dresses looked good, and what could be mixed together to create an individual, unforgettable, utterly perfect design. The designs will be in the post by the end of next week at a very small fee. I can’t wait. I feel so lucky I’ve found the right person to make a dress that will be truly mine.
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