Staggered’s Ultimate TV Weddings Part IIV
So who made the final cut and entered the hallowed hall of our Ultimate TV Hall of Fame, an actual hall which we’re building at ridiculous expense just off J14 of the M6. Find out NOW!
3 – ‘Saffron’ & Malcolm Reynolds (Firefly, Our Mrs Reynolds)
Long before dazzling audiences with her classic beauty and buttoned-down ’60s sex appeal as Joan Holloway in Mad Men, Christina Hendricks was busy being all naked and articulate in the short-lived masterpiece that was Firefly.
A master of deception, our Mrs Reynolds plays the part of doting, dutiful, innocent wife to Mal, her only wish to serve him, and to, erm, “cleave to (him)…as the furrow to the plow” *cough* all the while plotting to commandeer his beloved ship Serenity and deliver it into the hands of illegal salvage operators.
Her masquerade commences when she invites Mal to join her in a choreographed dance at post-job celebration, later revealed to be a wedding ritual. The lesson in this is to make sure you know what you’re getting into, and with whom. And if you don’t get the girl at all, stay in your bunk and shake your own rainstick.
2 – Calculon and ‘Coilette’, aka Bender Bending Rodriguez (Futurama, Bend Her)
Can anyone give us a steer on finding Futurama eps online? It would totally beat “working”.
After Bender’s plan to fix the Robot Olympics by competing as a woman becomes jeopardised by the gender testing, he undergoes a sex-change procedure and becomes media darling ‘Coilette’. His friends think he’s taken things a step too far when he accepts a marriage proposal from famous acting robot Calculon, swayed by his vast fortune.
In order to negate the wedding, but hoping to spare Calculon’s feelings, the Planet Express crew stage an elaborate faked soap opera wedding, during which ‘Coilette’ is apparently killed off. If it feels like your wedding is turning into a soap opera, just think how much crazier it could be.
1 – Mindy & Barry Farber (Friends, The One With Barry and Mindy’s Wedding)
Click picture for clip
The various nuptials of the principal Friends characters were event television, which tells you a lot about the 1990s. Arguably the funniest and most touching scenes featured in this episode, as Ross and Rachel attend the wedding of Rachel’s former fiance Barry, to her former best friend Mindy.
The significance of this event can easily be underestimated in light of the more notorious story arcs of the show, but this story is the show. Taking the events of the series’ pilot and finale as bookends, it can be said that Friends is ostensibly the tale of an entitled, pampered princess who turns her back on an easy, but ultimately hollow existence in favour of growing strong and becoming independent with the help of her friends.
Indeed, it is Rachel’s flight from Barry that kicks off the series, as the spoilt daddy’s girl descends on Central Perk in her wedding dress, before being encouraged to cut up her credit cards, do her own laundry, work nine to five, changing her life and the lives of her friends forever, and creating a television phenomenon. It’s a huge turning point then, when a humiliated Rachel, taunted and reviled by the same guests who attended her own aborted wedding and embarrassed by Ross’ sweet but clumsy attempts at chivalry, defiantly takes the mic and shows them all how far she’s outgrown them.
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