A Marriage Proposal Masterclass

It’s just one little sentence, but working out how you’ll utter the immortal words, “Will you marry me?” is something you’ll agonise over, and rightly so. It’s a story that will be retold for the rest of your life, and you want to make it special. But how do you make sure your proposal has the wow factor? We’re not going to give you a list of off-the-peg ideas (not this time, at least), but we will tell you what you need to think about to make sure she’s so blown away she can only say yes.

Good bend, bad arms

LOCATION

Location is all-important, and if chosen correctly may do most of the work for you. If you’ve a holiday planned out, research romantic locations in your chosen destination before you go, but be prepared to be flexible if things don’t work out as planned. (Your girlfriend won’t want to be put on the spot when she’s suffering a chronic case of Delhi belly). Maybe there’s a special spot for the two of you closer to home: the scene of your first date, or a favourite place you both share.

TIMING

Think about the time of day you want to propose. Proposing over cornflakes before you both go to work is not a good idea. Proposing when you have the whole day to yourselves is. We’ve already listed a few occasions when it’s a rubbish time to propose but if you’re canny then you can tie it to a special occasion (birthday, Christmas Eve, NYE, etc) and thus reduce the number of occasions in the future you’ll have to remember and commemorate (e.g. “I can’t believe you forgot this is the 15th year since you proposed!” becomes “Happy Birthday love, can’t believe it was fifteen years since you said Yes. Happy birthday/proposal anniversary thing.”)

THE WORDING

Great posture, dropped points for chainsaw

Think of the proposal as an intimate moment that requires a little foreplay. Don’t just blurt it out; build up to it with some well-chosen words that express your feelings. You might think this is the time for schmaltz (think the poems from inside Hallmark cards) but it turns out that sincerely declaring your love and saying how you feel is the most romantic thing you can possibly do, which saves thinking of words that rhyme at least.

TRADITION

The bended knee moment is the big event, the money shot. No matter how you’re doing it, it’s a good idea to work the move in somehow.

CREATIVITY

A creative proposal will make your intended target feel special: it’s something you’ve thought about, something personal to you as a couple and something that won’t be repeated. But don’t let it strangle you: Staggered knows of one man who dilly-dallied so long trying to think of a creative stunt his girlfriend got pregnant first and he blurted out a proposal within ten minutes of receiving the news.

STUNTS

Stunts, gimmicks and tricks can work well, but as with the creativity idea, don’t feel you have to go for something overly elaborate as there’s a greater chance of things going wrong. Something simple: have friends set up a romantic picnic, which you can just stumble upon. Something overly complicated: being airlifted in through the bathroom window dressed as the Milk Tray man. Or this.

CLICHES

Doing it at the top of the Eiffel Tower, asking the waiter to bring out the ring on a platter… these are the kind of yawn-inducing ideas that you should avoid at all costs. More proposal ideas to avoid…

HIDING THE RING

Presenting the ring is the big ‘reveal’ moment, so it’s worth thinking about clever ways to make it appear. If you’re going to hide it somewhere, make sure it won’t be found before the big moment, and if you’re going to put it in food or drink, make sure you’ve boned up on the Heimlich manoeuvre first.

PUBLIC OR PRIVATE

You’ll know better than anyone whether your girlfriend is the type who likes to be the centre of attention or someone who would gnaw off her own leg to avoid being on camera. If she’s the former, a public proposal might go down well, so why not throw a party, propose at a sporting event or do it in the middle of Trafalgar Square? If not, it’s best to keep the proposal between the two of you.

Perfect.

VIA A THIRD PARTY

It’s a cliché, but local radio DJs love announcing on-air proposals because it reminds them that they’ve got at least two listeners. You might even be able to get her favourite band to do it at a gig, but seriously, no one associates romance and pure love with the Jumbotron.

THE ABSENT PROPOSAL

We don’t particularly agree with this one and we’ve discussed the proposal over the phone at length, but we’ve also heard stories of men setting up web pages that click through to a proposal, or spelling out proposals in fridge magnets. Our feeling is this: it’s your proposal, you should at least have the courtesy to be there, and any proposal that relies on being ‘found’ is prone to timing problems.

PERSONALISED PROPOSALS

You know your girlfriend better than anyone. If she’s a nerdy World Of Warcraft obsessive, why not propose to her in the game? If her dog is her pride and joy, can you train it to trot up with the ring ribboned around its neck?

TAKE THE HINT

Have you ever talked about proposals together? If so, can you remember what she said? Can any of her mates help you out (providing they can keep their gobs shut obviously). Your girlfriend may have a very specific idea of how she’d like to be proposed to, and if so, it’s your job to make sure you don’t disappoint. If you’re thinking long term, try and slip a conversation in about proposals, perhaps prompted by some friends who’ve recently announced their engagement.

Related Posts:

• Commission In A Box: Ingenious Proposal Solution
• She Said Yes! (Part 1)
• Pop The Question: Perfect Placeholder Rings
• One Ring To Rule Them Both
• Mmmbop And Questions Popped Part One